Reframing

We all have days that turn to custard and our negative thoughts can loop around like a record.

With the combination of my Dad’s cancer concerns and uncertain travel plans, mozzies keeping me awake half the night nibbling at my arms - my brain cells are subsequently on low fire mode and I just feel snappy. The kids were fighting none stop this morning, taking each others things, scrapping over toothpaste, you know how it is! Then there’s trying to wrap up a zillion projects, realising the car needs a WOF and trying to work out how to get the kids where they need to be for their sports and activities now we share a car and need to be 3 places at the same time.

I used to think that on days like this, which will always be part of normal family life(and my god I’ve had so much worse in those baby phase days!) that I should suck it up and tell myself how lucky I am and ultimately just pretend to be happy.

But, my positive psychology studies have taught me otherwise.

Burying your feelings is so unhealthy and it is the root of so many of the challenges we face as adults today!!

So instead. I have learnt to reframe…

1. ACCEPT that I feel like sh*t today and letting that be ok.

2. AVOID THE NEGATIVE REPLAY: Not make myself feel even worse by wallowing on my worries over and over. I have written them down, they are out of my head.

3. LOOK FOR THE GOOD: Our brain has a negative bias so wants to focus on the problems, but instead, find evidence to show your brain, you are safe and you do have choices about how the rest of your day rolls.

The good news is:

I have mozzie repellent so can sort that for a better night tonight
I can move a flexible meeting I have to later in the week when I’ll be able to think better
I can acknowledge my tired related frustration and apologise to the kids for overreacting (also a lesson for them in there)
I can plan to sort a great meaningful gift for my Dad

Mental well-being is so much more than chasing happiness. It’s about having tools and skills to cope with real life.

Claire x